The Weed- will trample your heart.


I’m searching inside for something to help define me

All that populates is the emotion –

Weak – inside me.

Over and over – the word like  a strained bacteria multiplying in a temperate  simmering heat.

Don’t want to speak -move my feet.

Feel like a caricature  of a human being.

Falling,

Let me fall into some black  abysmal seeing.

You are the strongest person I know ,says he.

You mad fool!

what has love done for  you ?

to be so possessed by the voodoo in me?

Stop.

Stop,

I want to stop feeling.

Yellow, blue ,red  little pills rally around me

These little friends have mastered their great skill to feed me and confound me.

Blister packets pop, festive like its the the fourth of July.

Muted  slumber please come and and blind me – let me just lie..

Still Water.

Values made of plastic.

bottled up emotions.

Swallow.

there is no  nectar sweet song in my voice that follows.

Anxiety pervades. I have to shout  out – GO THE FUCK AWAY!

Petrified.

timid ..

… like a creature crawling out the wood works.

the first sign of stress and sorrow !

A trail of slime leaves evidence   that this creature has no courage to face life’s cruel, sooty smirks.

To hell with it all

Horror.

Take me down — let me fall.

Sleep ,

make sure the crash  comes from somewhere steep.

Don’t let me   wake up -covered in wet rags.

the apology  of my life will be over when I wake up and grab for my fags.

Smoke screen.

It’s the best way I know how to protect my own self esteem.

Selfish.

shell fish.

Lost my nerve.

Caught  and quartered in the nets  of the absurd.

Find myself served up as a delicacy dish;.

Eat me

Drink me

Consume me -if you must.

Just don’t make me face this reality

for my soul has gone  and inanely  combust.

A Let down.

 Shaking out Scraggley hair

This is  all I have to show for the  one I claim I hold in my heart – dear and fair.

Slumber come and give me my due

infiltrate my blood with toxin.

That takes my body and locks in .

Show the true colour of my heart –

a dismal, manic smudge of dark blues.

Singing.

I’m sorry  my love

I am that nefarious dove.

Aces .

hearts.

we are meant to be the best pair.

Now I lay me down to sleep,

Tomorrows’s bells   will awake me  to  a harrowing  carnival fair.

A Rendez vous .

no time to be fashionably  late.

My dearest,

 if I let you down and forget to close the gate-

may I  languish in my putrid stench of cowardice.

Have no fear. Please rest.

May I never truly fully  awake from this hell I have made my  home state paradise .

 

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30 thoughts on “The Weed- will trample your heart.

  1. You manage to capture the rhythm of speech in your lines.

    The other thing I like about this piece is that I get the sense that the lines will fly apart…that it’s that rhythm that unifies the words. Nice work.

    AND

    I’ve nominated you for the Respect Award…

    You don’t have to do a thing…

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Things can get better. I’m glad you’re managing to express your feelings through writing. I do this a lot as well, although I don’t post it. Does it feel cathartic to you? I hope so.
    Remember, the one thing that true’s in life is that it never stays still

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Daisy, you poured out so much emotion in this poem. I don’t even know where to start.
    This is a different side of you I have never read before. Which is a good thing because I can sense that you are a fragile and sensitive person. That explains why I connect with you in so many ways. Lovely a beautiful masterpiece of poetry. 🙂 My favorite. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  4. A lot of powerful statements in here. I love this kind of poetry actually, when it’s an ugly subject, but the language is so beautiful. That’s how I try to write a lot. My favorite example: “may I languish in my putrid stench of cowardice”.

    Liked by 2 people

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