Renegade Master


Revenge is sweet or so they say.

So who is the one that is really  being made to pay?

She  guzzles her  anger ,hurt and fury,

like a roused up Praying mantis,

ready to rip  off this beasts head, in a frantic attempt, to salvage whats left in this life that she can call –

her purity.

Children are the innocents .

You’re big enough  and ugly enough  to cum inside her –

then understand  her need to protect those from the worlds deviants.

This world is no place for a future life.

She is a good enough mom to understand this.

Granted, she is shit at playing Odysseus’s  wife.

This is not a stage – a script to be acted out and forgotten.

No actors here, who signed a contract to play Penelope- like  emotion and then pack up to the city of Gotham.

The other man should not be the one in her house.

It should be the one who, if he had a couple of quid may be drinking the bars version of  Grouse.

Whisky.

Frisky.

How did this get to the point where home has become a macabre carnival of freaks infesting making her  heave up sick?

See,

This is not what she  had in mind when she  took a chance at ruining everything that made her  happy and secure.

She jumped off the cliff like that impulsive prick,

 who stirred up  her emotions with words of

 banter-

sappy.

 a mouth full of  horse manure.

They are  trying to move on with there lives

But the twoker just hides his head in the sand and sighs  –

 Hides!

 When he finally has the attention of the people like a psychopath he  enjoys hearing his name in fandom cries.

Got a couple of questions –

Silence.

Got a couple of questions-

Silence.

The snake slithers to Eves  tree and words come tumbling out like a pair of hard , synthetic tits.

Words get  looser than a punters belt -such care.

Adam knew that what would happen would cause their worlds –  to  go into a full blown  seizure and slather out and play out  in fits.

Give the innocent man in this peace!

He is trying to sort this out without taking a machete  to the neck, and slice it like he is slaughtering a fucking cock- sure geese.

Is she innocent?

Is she fuck?

She has had  it out with  the so called  “other” guy in their home.

and she has had to get on her knees –

gargle,

deep throat  ,

gag.

Suck it up like a  woman – fully grown.

Call her a whore.

Who is the one acting like a boar?

Wild animals usually get shot, just for squealing a little too loud on some one else’s plot.

Land.

This whore  can stand.

For the record no mattress strapped to her back is needed for her to look life straight in the eye.

In fact,

she spends most of her life running around making sure  she tries to protect all her keepsakes from falling apart.

These are not just some elementary materialistic , reusable items.

These are the very sentiments- people even!

Closest to her heart.

She  may hurt who she loves .

Leave well alone and she will figure a way to sort out whats descends  from the Aboves.

 Hurt another  who she loves?

Irrationality sets in,

Betrayal from another side means getting your skates on and whizzing out into exile.

before the storm of retribution comes for you,

remember nature has a tenacious  tendency to  win.

No noble, solar powered efforts to save the world are going  help you in your redemption’s.

You will still  remain looking far  worse off  than the  sootiest oil barons -sleeping on their ever increasing hard cash  pensions.

You never even bothered to  make your bed before you lay in it.

Fuck this is bullshit!

I am wasting my time on something that can’t summon up some snivelling self respect.

Bang tidy.

Shady,

covers up a heart ,

truly  Grimy.

All Questions,

Require answers,

That is more rational thinking than mind fucking and mentally bashing her and her lot.

It may seem like she is the one who has fucking gone all doolally,

but listen , mate the only one  around here, is digging  his own grave.

So who has truly  lost the plot?

Context.

If your cock can manage to stand  up  for  all of of  5 minutes –

granted some help was needed but it’s still  proof there must be some bone inside that piddly self esteem ,woe is me  ,paper thin  skin, innit?

Man the fuck up and get your spine together, straighten this  shit out,  never been  at a loss for words before ?

So why not end this now ?

Engage your mouth, practice  your rhetoric   before you go out trying to be the new king  and attempt to put your  spin on  it.

Peace needs a resurrection.

We want to move on.

Answer some questions so this pathetic game of yours  can be undone.

 

 

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28 thoughts on “Renegade Master

  1. Darling, I know everyone is writing in praise of how well written this is, and I agree it totally is ☺ but more important to me is how you are feeling now?, as all this sounds very autobiographical. Are you OK poppet? I read this post earlier and didn’t comment as I felt sad reading it, like I had empathically picked up on your feelings… I had to have a sleep and felt very emotionally heavy! Weird! It just happens like that for me sometimes. I feel a responsibility for you Daisy..like I wanna care for you. You’re lush to me ❤❤💖

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    • I feel angry. A lot has happened. I am venting. I need to use my words. I don’t want u to worry about me. I apreciate and adore you for your support of me. Give me tour email if u want and we can chat about it further. It is complicated. I have a great support system around me. I just give my heart and time to people who don’t give a fuck . It is all a learning curve . I crave friendship but it always seems to come at some higher cost. . O am a good person but if some one plays mind games and plays with my heart . I do have a sting in my tail. Everyday my heart is gaining strength again. I punished myself for being all wrong. I am no angel far from it but I’m honest , direct and I don’t hide. This may come across as angry and I am glad I have reached this stage. I do need to take the PISS and keep some sense of humour too. All my life experiences can be used for further plot developments. I see the good in people but sometimes I have to balance that with the bad. We are a mixture of the two in my opinion. I am a softie but when I get screwed over or some one hurts my own or refuses to stand up and speak. I very quickly lose respect and I hate injustice and cowardice. I’m not saying I’ve never done things like this before in my own life. It is complicated. Like I say we are all yin and yan. Sorry if this sounds like a rant and a bit of a mess. I have a lot on at the moment . I have high expectations for what I have set out to achieve and I am no quitter. I’m not angry with u or anyone on here. All of your support sometimes is what makes my day brighter. To be acknowledged is a simple act but pwerful enough to change someone’s own feelings of one self. Xxx 😊😊😊

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      • My email is imanisummer@yahoo.com 🙂 I do understand what you’re saying and you don’t need to apologise one bit…I was just trying to say how interconnected I feel with particular bloggers and you are one of my kindrid souls so I cross over emotionally sometimes and feel your emotions. They are catching because you write about them and describe them in such a raw way which I love. You are a very driven lady and I respect you a lot. I fully get how important acknowledgement and validation is when you have so much internal chaos going on. ps. I’m sorry for my slow reply, I’ve been chatting to a friend on the phone for hours! I want to be a positive force for change in your life in whatever way I can, however big or small, I’m here for you. There is something about you that draws me in. You’ve got the x factor baby haha XXX 🙂

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      • OMG you should have read my blog when I was in full flow darling, I let everything hang out. I went full throttle with emotional release and it was fucking messy but so necessary and so freeing. I was not intending to make you feel bad. Your post was tagged “mental health.” I’ve lived mental health-I fully get the utter shitness of it and the need to express yourself fully. That’s what blogging is. I just seem to go on this rollercoaster with the people who’s blogs I follow and feel their pain, but then love celebrating their triumphs. It’s a package deal 🙂 Loads of love to you Xx

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      • Oh I am so glad I didn’t zap you of your energy. I think we have the best approach . Be our own bad ass selves – ha ha!. Why hide what we feel and think? Mental health is a big part of everyone’s lives. We all have Mental health. Sometimes we have good MH and bad MH – people have certain degrees at certain points in their lives and use a variety of coping mechanisms- Good and Bad. There is still so much Stigma around Mental health. As you know. I refuse to be afraid of being judged because I experience life in a certain way. A lot of people are walking on this planet un diagnosed and some don’t want to be labelled. Fair enough! But what are the reasons for that? Being scared of what people will think?
        Please know my friend. I know you have been through your fair share of ups and downs and may continue too. I will always be there for you as you are for me.
        Also know that I am rather good at surviving and pulling myself out of the dark. My Mom always says – ‘how many times have you tried to end it? put yourself in situations where you should be dead? (More than 100 I would say) .
        She believes (her) God has a plan – When it is not our time – it is not our time and no matter if we try and gas ourselves in car, OD, have a car crash, get involved with the wrongest sorts of people who only wish to exploit or whatever. If you still have work to do in this Life, something or someone will happen/come along to get you out of your situation. No matter how many times you go back to that shit. If you have more to do in this life then life will make sure of it.
        I kind of get her logic.
        I respect your what you say and I don’t want to hurt anybody. I just don’t enjoy being hurt. Or seeing people I care about being hurt so I have this darkness in me that says’ Enough! Time to get on your level and speak your language’ ( If that makes sense?)
        Nobody in my opinion is entirely bad even the people who hurt or have hurt me but when I have reached my limit and feel betrayed and used. I would advice that person to cross the street when they see me coming.

        I am full on heart. Wear it for everyone to see and maybe that is something I need to work on. I may do crazy shit when I feel hurt or guilty or whatever emotion and do irrational “crazy” things. How many people haven’t done irrational and ” crazy ” shit in their lives when it all goes tits up? A lot of people have a closest packed to capacity with their skeletons and probably even need to hire out a warehouse for the rest of them. lol.

        I stand up for what I believe in. I own up to who I am and what I do -Good and Bad. Actions have consequences. I can’t control another persons behaviour and I won’t let anyone try and control mine unless it is for the greater good.
        words are my weapon- better than a gun or a knife!
        I let people say what they want about me and I couldn’t care less -well I care when I think that they care but then I have to get clever and realise that not all people can be up front and tend hide from their own demons. I know I should let it go and I will but it will be on my terms. They may know my name but as the saying goes they don’t know half of my story.
        At least I know I am human because I feel. I suspect you and I are alike in that way. We feel too much for people and sometimes it is the wrong people we waste our energy on.
        I could have carried on a bender – trying to self medicate – numb myself . I chose to do it the hard way and face up to my feelings and thrash it out.
        I will come to acceptance. It is part of the process of grief.
        What I feel is not what maybe another person feels and it is easy to get things lost in communication. Especially in texts and emails.
        These crazy poems have helped me. I have cut loose a few strings and soon it will be like the person never existed.
        I’m rather good at making a person feel invisible if I want to. I sound callous and a woman scorned- Damn right but I want to live the positive life again and I will do anything to get back to that.
        This has been a major dip but I am on the rise and I am getting back to being the person who I can live with and be happy with

        Sorry Again about the long rant. I hope this clears things up a bit I ? You and all the Bloggers I support – the ones i have regular contact are so inspiring and really help me move forward. I love to hear what you think and feel. It is good to look at all perspectives.

        Love you loads , beautiful xx

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