When OCD got messy


Shout out to LINDA G stream of consciousness   – check out what it is all about here

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Caught out -over indulging on sexual delicacies.

Orgasming, glow in the dark visuals projected onto her Fantasia cranium mental ceiling.

So novel.

Walls cave in – was it just lust  that caused her to make up all this fuss?

Why did she do it?

once. twice. three times?

Her heart was consumed. ‘Rose-tinted glasses’ a voice shouts out  and presumes.

She thinks there was real depth to some of her proclaimed emotions. How can she even look at another confectionary when she already  has the sweetest deal?

Her dowry is  her  very own Wonka factory.

There was no excuse for her to set foot out of her mind and demand to feel more satisfactory.

Does momma know her better than she does ?

Always want what you can’t have!  5-year-old  drops to the floor.

Toys R us.

Not leaving till she comes outs with  a red, tanked up, M&M replica bus.

Ready to dice herself up and fling herself into a blender – sexting, texting -somewhat fulfilling,

but not having anyone  else to indulge with afterward, leaves her with a rebellious sense that can only be satisfied by means of  tangible  bondage style correcting.

Honest to a breaking point.

Target those she wants to anoint.

Commitment. Did  she truly know what she was taking on?

She realized her demise when she demanded the same form of commitment from some other, partly innocent feckless person in an ‘ I’m- doing -alright‘ disguise.

Bonfire night explosions went off in their usually tranquil  home.

He sat back too long ,let her spirit roam and defend its right to move within another astral zone.

 Kitchen sink drama screams ,sweeping up the spindly staircase.

Mother clocks eyes with her child, rubbing her slumbered eyes – runs to pick her up and wipe away salty tears from her face.

Heart beating wildly. What has she done.

The sickly cost of seeking out more affection afflicting her  startled young.

Time to move forward.

She has respect, love, honesty, faithfulness, a family, laughter and more than she ever thought she deserved.This place under the shady protective arms rooted to the spot – she truly earned

Time to act like a true woman, tend to  her man and family –   like one would a tree – keep those roses -tidy, pruned – this time the tree still stands .

May lightening strike her heart and torment the rest of her living days if this time she hasn’t  learned.

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14 thoughts on “When OCD got messy

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