Always look up


‘Always look up wherever you go – those who walk with there eyes to the floor miss out on so much of life’ 



What a palaver!

I spent weeks working on trying to figure out a way to sell my products on a free WordPress template.

A lovely friend of mine suggested – Wix and e -commerce.

I was in entrepreneur, creative business utopia until I had to learn the system …

It’s been challenging. It is still a challenge but I am seeing progress and, I am getting so excited for when we finally go live.






If you have followed my previous posts on from the start of doing my MA,  you will know it has been an ocean of tidal waves and tsunamis and, high tides and low tides.

These still waters of mine run deep.

My First TMA (tutor marked assignment)   Act one of a stage script about a homeless couple received a CLEAR PASS  of 62%

There were tears, miscommunication, fall outs, despair and I lost confidence in my writing abilities.

TMA 2 ( my second genre -Fiction writing)  I wrote a supernatural piece about a girl who (accidently) commits suicide.

Lat night, my tutor emailed me to say she was having an issue submitting my marks via the online system and she didn’t want me to start worrying, so, she copy and pasted all the feedback and my mark into an email.

She gave me useful and extensive advice on what I propose to write for my EMA ( end of module assignment due in May 2017)

The second act to the homeless couple script.


I do feel more supported, understood, challenged and more confident in achieving what I want to do with my writing for this piece.

Oh, the results for my TMA 2

82%   a HIGH MERIT.

I’m back to the marks I was getting when I was doing my final year of my BA in the Art and humanities.

I need to keep this momentum going. I don’t want to find myself under merit territory again.


I invest a lot of time in people and the things and causes I dedicate my time to.



One thing I have had to put on the back burner is helping to  co-facilitate 12 weeks of WRAP (wellness recovery action plan self-management program) with the EIP   ( early intervention prevention ) team for people diagnosed with at least one episode a psychotic episode

I’m gutted. There were many issues that led me to distance myself from this.

Two being:

Issues of funding and logistics.

I enjoyed meeting up the people I was going to work with. I loved their energy and enthusiasm.

A lot was promised and then not delivered.

 I felt the need to email my colleagues and tell them what I thought about how the course was put together- I was my usual blunt self and not very diplomatic.  Ooops…

I feel that if the NHS ( national health system) in the U.K. expects results from a new therapy or a new way of self-help/lifestyle and illness management program, then scrimping on pounds is not helping promote or inspire that WRAP works.

In the long term WRAP  (run properly) will most likely save the NHS money.

As far as I’m aware- nobody knows what is going on with this current  WRAP workshop. I haven’t fallen out with anyone. I can’t give all my energy into something if everyone doesn’t  have the same vision.

For me, it needs more planning and preparation and I’m not going to be that person who just turns up to volunteer at a workshop to go –

‘Oh look at me, I’m making a difference’ – when I know, in my heart, the results this particular workshop can have on people’s lives if  it is implemented properly.

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I’m currently putting my energy into other charities I work with to see how I can help them.


I wasn’t nervous until I got to the place. I arrived early. It was bitterly cold and I hate the cold.

It turned out to be incredible.

We did a few  Actor warm up activities such as being aware of filling the space and being aware of other Actors around us.

We did some improvisation and using our body exercises to convey emotion.  Loads of fun!

What a lovely bunch of people. I am definitely going to the next session next week. We all seem to have common goals and everyone is so unique and interesting.



There is a possibility we may (or may not) put together a little something to perform to students at the university after the 8 weeks.  How awesome is that?

I do try and keep up with you all on here. It has been difficult but the more knowledge and confidence I gain in the above  areas of my life – the more time I will  get to have fun- one being reading blogs and blogging random stuff


 It was my husbands birthday on Valentine’s day. We have a sleigh bed!

hi ho!  hi ho! it’s off to bed I go – ha ha! It’s massive – king size!


After the mid-term school holidays in February, my Bella – my daughter will be joining Year one ( she is in reception at the moment)  for her reading and writing class.

She has two mates with her who are excelling just like her and she is a bit of a whizz kid at Maths.


Long story short. Pushing other people’s buttons to get an honest answer has been difficult -emotionally- to sit with – without trying to avoid the emotions by self-medicating.

I’ve been angry at myself for nearly destroying the best thing  I have in my life- my family – because, I believed ( with help) that someone cared more about me than they actually did.I put a lot of my energy into helping a person when they had a meltdown last year. It all got thrown back in my face.


I finally know the truth. That is all I ever wanted. Now, it’s time to let sleeping dogs lie.

That’s it – all very boring but it’s all happening

Physically. I’m eating better and I have more energy. I haven’t lost weight which is something that terrifies me equally as putting on weight does.





A jar of Hopourrie

Caught up on a few of your posts tonight. 😀


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A sense of accomplishment!



Short reflection (First day down) onWRAP( wellness recovery action plan) facilitator   training.

A stream of consciousness.

Heart beating, struggling to breathe, it’s my  turn next to have a go honing in on my  public speaking skills and being a co-facilitator, speaking about one core value and ethic  of what the  WRAP self-management program means  to me  and why.

  • Breathe.

  • Make a few bullet point notes.

  • Listen to what others are saying. Listen……. 

  • Don’t pre-empt what I am going to say while listening to others.

  • Try and understand where that person  who is currently in the hot seat,is coming from.

  • We are all nervous – we all have feelings.

  • Oooh, look!  A   squishy ,colorful  ball to play with,it lights up. I hope  there is no one who is sensitive to  flashing light in this room . Just Fucking do it. 

  • Remember, my reason for doing what I am  doing.

  • This is not about what others think but about how I develop as a person and what it  means to me,in my life – there is a bigger picture.

  • Smile.

  • wing it.

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  • Look people in the eyes when  I speak.

  • Acknowledge my nerves if need be.

  •  stick to the topic.

  • Believe in my  own worth.


Choose one out  of the 15, WRAP ETHICS AND VALUES  that form the basis and success  of the WRAP  self-management program, get into pairs to practice co-facilitating  (with someone I have never met before). Here is  what I chose and what I had to say.



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HERE   ( there are 15)

  Here’s another link if you enjoyed what you read 😀



Difficult feelings and behaviors are seen as normal responses to traumatic circumstances viewed in the context of what is happening, not as symptoms or a diagnosis.


What I said: Three minutes starts now: tick tock






“Long story short, I grew up in what is commonly referred to in society as a dysfunctional family and upbringing. Grew up around mental illness, addictions / people who used  bad coping mechanisms .

I , family members of mine were Stigmatized because of that.

The global / U.K. NHS model for dealing with Mental health is not working.

Change is needed.

Labels and diagnoses should be a guideline -not something that you are stuck with for life.

We all have feelings – not all  most feelings are irrational/impulsive.

Society is uncomfortable with  dealing with other  people’s feelings.

Feelings can’t be reduced to mere symptoms of illness 

We all have Mental health. We all have a mind and a body. 

We are all subject to episodes of good and bad MH on a  sliding scale spectrum.

People with Feelings should be encouraged  to share them. 

We are all unique. 

We share many similar qualities and are complex beings.

Our narratives – our  personal story.

how we came to be who we are today and who we will become should be  determined by being able to express our feelings and thoughts without being labeled in jargony terms ( if we want it that way).

We are human.  Let’s stop hiding it and act like it.

There is no shame in being human and feeling happy/sad/ insert emotion.

I believe,there is this cultural mentality that people with Mental Health “issues”  ( every human being on this planet btw)  who have come out or indeed still continue to suffer in silence are  deemed incapable of taking true, positive  personal responsibility for our own health in an empowering manner.

I think,We are afraid because we have been told we don’t have the mental capacity to manage ourselves in the current medical, prescribed  model set- up  that we rely on still to this day.

This links into another crucial value and ethic of WRAP  which is  what my co-facilitator will touch upon now”  

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Self-determination, personal responsibility, empowerment, and self-advocacy are key aspects of this program.

How I sum up what my three-minute co-facilitator said, in my own mind, is:

Understanding and wanting to understand how to manage your own issues in new ways – safe ways , different ways requires determination. One step and that is already a person taking responsibility for their path – their mind /their body. 

The result – I have found, is usually empowering.

I can do this.

Why ?

I have just done it.

WOW! Fucking shit man….. 

Carry on working on ourselves and focusing on what makes us well, unwell, etc…. is a great prescription. Self-advocacy is a prescription a person gives themselves. 


Because I know myself better than anyone. I don’t care who believes it or not. 

You know yourself better than any Doctor, family member or friend. You live in your head and body.

I am the expert on me and I can be pretty fucking resourceful if I am pointed in the right direction.

That’s it.

I’m Knackered.


My Bella Bee is  back at school.  Missed her  first day at  BIG  school. 😦

My GHD’s  said a big F U  to me this morning ……


I did it.

I can’t even focus on the words  on my MA in Creative writing   on the Open University website that is finally open and we have full access  to use.


What do I want to write about?

Social issues/ issues that affect us as humans.

I do know that my first Tutor marked assignments  (TMA) is going to be an 18-minute play about a homeless person and how society and the community can succeed in aiding  a vulnerable person  to help him/herself.

Be kind to yourself.

Be kind and rewind. Remember that one?


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Catch up soon!

Loads of shout outs as promised  at the end of the week.

Can’t wait to explore all the new blogs and Bloggers in the Willows and beyond.

Good night!

Daisy ❤ ❤






Daisy in the Willows

I have been quiet on the WRAP  front – wellness recovery action plan . Only  for the reason I knew this testimonial video would be available for YOU and others who want to take their life in their hands and have a plan for if it all goes down the toilet.  Eeeugh!


Anyway here it is. I think it will have more of a powerful effect on those of you who do decide to watch it. Instead of me waffling about it over 12 weeks on camera. If you want to  to do WRAP and are not in a physical place close to where I live. You can still do it via my WRAP page. No costs – for free.  Or you can go to the founder of Mary Ellan Copeland and pay for the various material (if it is not free) that can be…

View original post 64 more words

Stand up and be counted.


No more wallowing in the pit of my mind- beating myself up.

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Time to get back out into the world and live.

These are my plans for today:


I have been thinking to myself , what is the point of just arguing my beliefs and doing fuck all about it? The least I can do is show my face and lend some support. I also think it is important to let my daughter  know I stand up for what I believe is right and wrong.

I can only be the best role model possible and I won’t get it right all the time. Whatever she chooses to believe and value in her life as she gets older, I want her to be active and be a part of her community.

Change only comes about from action.

What is happening in America is disgusting. I posted this on my personal FB time line and I am posting it here. It is  not just about the refugee situation but it has everything to do with humanity and justice and equality.

You think we would have learnt something from the Civil rights movement in America – Song dedicated to to all the people who have lost their own lives and their families who are suffering . It is not about Black or White but about what is Right and Wrong!


If you don’t know the meaning  behind this song and how this stirred  more outrage hatred in the White Americans. Read about it here. This song was revolutionary. Martin Luther King was murdered because he wanted justice and equality for his people. He spoke up for his people. Nina Simone had to leave America (whose  own life became at risk), she had a 2 year break down and was diagnosed with Bipolar. She risked her singing career for politics and I admire this woman. Such a loss. She lived a long time though.

Simone is singing to an audience that enjoys her, but does not understand her. Any hope is balanced: “You don’t have to live next to me/Just give me my equality.”

I’m not usually one to get political on  my Blog. At least I don’t think I do.

I will then come home and do my SHOUT OUTS ready for Monday morning and check out some new Blogs – and read as many of the the  epic Blogs and thoughts of those I already follow.

Going to push myself to give LINDA G HILLS soCS a bash.


Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is: “concentration.” Use it any way you see fit. Have fun!


The lazy version of this prompt is:

I refuse to live in the concentration camp that is in my mind for another day. Beating myself up, gassing myself with guilt and thoughts of rejection and ideas that I am not good enough.  🙂



THANK YOU  to those who have stuck by me with all this shit going on but I am back in business.

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Laters  xoxoxo ❤


PERMISSION: to Fuck up and pick myself up

“I fuck up all the time. I also make sure I get my shit together and fight for what I want  and who I want in my life. I can’t fight for the ones who give up on me but I can only wish them the very best “


Apologies for not reading as many Blogs as usual. I have read as many as my mind can take in.  It’s been pretty rough for me lately.


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All very “woe  is me” and it has got boring!

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 but it is a  new -ish day!

I needed too get something optimistic out into the Blogo sphere

My tuition loan for my MA in Creative writing has come through- waiting on  one more loan to come through.

I don’t take no for an answer!

Then 2 years from now I will do a mini PHD top up and go and rule my world!

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Oh and in other great News,

I’ve been officially approved on the WRAP training facilitator course in September. If you don’t know about it yet. You will do. I will merge my own personal WRAP PLAN and journey with my new role of holding the space for others to have courage and believe in themselves and feel safe to go on their own journey .

I’m not a teacher, merely a person who has  a chance to offer support.

Volunteering with  charities in Mental Health is the best thing I started doing with my life.

They know I have been ill , may even get ill again.  The point is, if I don’t put myself out there I will not have a chance to seize any opportunities.

Volunteering gives me drive, Keeps me focused, empowers me to do my best in life and if I manage to help a few people out on the way then what more can I ask for?


 Oh and here is how I was able to get on this course. Scroll down to check out my PLEA to get on this training.

Just hit scroll if you don’t want to hear me go on for oh 5 minutes on my video cam… 😀

This is my career. I take it seriously.

If you want to listen to me waffle about how I felt about WRAP way back in December 2015 – feel free. 5 minutes of me talking!

Oh the excitement! 😉

 Oh  and if you don’t want to know about WRAP.

I’m offended.

Ha ha! I’m not.

My WRAP page needs updating but if you want to know what Daisy get’s like when she is passionate and determined  CLICK HERE.

Never thought that me filming myself nearly a year ago would lead me to this.

Carpe Diem!


  1. I, Daisy Willows,agree to abide by the WRAP ethics and values.




When I was given the opportunity to be a part of WRAP, I didn’t know how much it was going to impact on my life and the lives of others.

I was and am by nature sceptical. I have relied on medication and psychotherapy and in patient treatment as a way of managing my mental health for most of my life.

WRAP was a three-month period where I began to realise that I could have more of a say in how I want to be treated and how I could cope differently.

I learnt so much. I now have so many different ways of coping and I find that when my mental health does dips, I do get back to being in a better mind state more quickly because of some of the techniques I have learned and adopted.

I believe WRAP is personal and unique to everyone who participates. I don’t think I took away the same thing as any  one of my peers.

It was an opportunity to discover more about myself. How I can help myself.

I learned to work as a team. I felt safe and I didn’t feel judged.


 WRAP has given me the confidence and skills to live a life I want to live. I want to be able to share that with others

I am able to take every aspect of what is covered in WRAP and either use it myself or pass on what I have learnt to others who may need advice.

I believe WRAP is the way forward with the CPA. I have given a plan over to my professionals who support me about my wants and what I don’t want to happen if I go into a crisis again.

I have alternative ways of coping with my wellness toolbox. I also have a post crisis plan to let people know when I am getting better and I can start taking more responsibility for what I can’t when I have been unwell.

WRAP is truly the best gift I ever received.

Is there anything bad to say about WRAP?

Well I suppose an open mind helps.

It requires commitment to wanting to improve my life and consistency.


Spread the word. Let  people know there is another way to manage Life in many different ways. I want be a Wrapper. Use my qualification to just offer support. I am no teacher but I can give my time and my energy and my listening skills. I am enthusiastic and passionate about WRAP. I believe I will be a great asset to getting this programme and alternative way of living out into our community. I use WRAP every day, even when I am not even aware it.

The skies the limit!


‘Try and not have any expectations. It will stop disappointment in it’s tracks. Whatever Good that  comes as a result of what you do will be a beautiful surprise.’



Things are looking up – I am getting back to being my best. This song has helped me-

So, for those who know about the Mental Health Awareness work shop I helped out with with Healthy Minds- Open Minds-Mental Health Education & Anti-Stigma Workshops on Wednesday. I got some incredible and ‘reach for the skies’ feedback. I pretty much aced it. People find me engaging  and  inspirational. Here is the link to the post I am talking about for those interested


so many good things to say to someone who has made epic mistakes in my life.

The best news of all?

The organisation who asked us to come in and deliver the work shop, want us to come back!  We did it!

I am kind of  am  buzzing.

Another epic thing that is happening in my life is I have finally decided to take the leap and applied for my MA in Creative Writing.

I am just waiting for confirmation from one more organisation. Please pray to whichever God you believe in that all will go  well for me.


send out (my way).


Saying my Mantra – multiple times a day. It hasn’t let me down yet.

It is the waiting factor that makes me anxious but I’m singing ‘Let it go’ on a loop . Well this is the version that resonates.  I do give a shit but I need to swagger it until confirmation comes through.

I have done everything in my power to make this happen and now I have to sit back and wait and see what happens. It is looking really positive.


This is what I probably look like at the moment

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Usually I wait about a week  and a bit before I get out my gratitude list  and have a look at all the new flowers in the Willows community.

The big SHOUT OUT  time can’t wait. I figured to take my mind off my expectations ,this would be a good time to be thankful for who and what I already have in  place my life.

This moment is what should matter and so this is a moment I give over  to you all –

As always.



A great start is to introduce you  Patty. She is a breeze of positivity  and brightness

Kruidje-roer-me-niet * Mimosa Piduca Kronkels van een wezentje op deze aardbol * Brain threads of a little creature on this globe   

“Live in the now, with the wisdom of the past, with one eye on the future. A future that we all can make happier, more loving, more positive.”

Patty Wolters

FADED ROUGE  Kanza is currently studying  and will be completing a Fashion Industry Essentials course from Teen Vogue and Parsons School of Design.  She is very much into Photography here is one of her snap shots. Like me, she has a thing for boxes. I love a bit of mystery and though I am an open book . There is a lot I keep for myself. Hiding thoughts and things in boxes has always been a thing for me.



 ASHUGULATI – is another avid photographer and a fine wordsmith too. I love how she describes herself .

 I am an introvert in person but extrovert at writing


FLOWERS&WILLOWS –  this twenty year old lady likes to refer to herself in the third person. She writes beautifully on a  variety of subjects from The Beauty of Age old tradition – WHAT ARE WE FORGETTING?

LIVING OUT LOUD- With my feet on the ground and head in the clouds… there is no way anyone can ignore such an epic titled and tag line Blog.  Alana is on a happiness project. I think you need to check this out. We are all in the pursuit of happyness, right? Happiness Project  -oh and she happens to also be working on her Transform your Life Project  – I love a person with a plan and goals.

Petrichors by Sema Dare to be Irreplaceable   – I’m not too sure how long this Blogger has been Blogging but I seem to be getting the vibe she is on the mission to keep happy. Always an inspiring place to want to end up or carry on being.

World Tourism Forum Travel Tips & Most Popular Tourist Attractions In The World – Tracy delivers everything we need to know about travelling. Again I am not too sure when she started Blogging but we all need Travel tips for those who love to Travel. I know I want to do more of it.

MOMENTD1POSE –  This Blog gives you access to the Jean- Noel Kegal’s passion in Photography.  His Blog also shows offf his Portfolio. If you want to follow the link to his Flicker account, here you go – . JEAN -NOEL KEGEL PHOTOGRAPHY ON FLICKER

Take a look at some of his work.

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 Not Just your average Beauty Blog- THE COZY CORNER –  This Blog truly lives up to its name- Beauty ,Fashion and Art.   A U.K.  Blogger too.  Which is really cool because I live in the U.K.  and I can get hold of what she recommends



PRIYANKAKHAVALE94-Its about every you   – Seemingly,new to Blogging but a great start with her first piece  Introduction of a frameless personality

ideajunkyard where all the trash in my head pours out as poetry. Enjoy!   – Raxtus specialises in Haiku Poetry- Something I have yet to try. I feel everyone is doing it. So if you feel you need a bit of inspiration – this may be your go to Haiku Poetry Blogger expert.

Here is a sample of one of his works entitled ‘Masked Rose’

‘your spring sakura face

inlaid with moonless eyes

betraying figmented love’


The Evolutionary Mind Live a Mindful Life, and Stay Motivated Along the Way A Blog with a collective of authors all dedicated to ‘Making your life count’ . Follow them on Facebook too.

skk95 – Started Blogging in June. Keep going. 🙂 It is so worth it.

Wall of Wonders The design blog & portfolio of Sarang Khanna –  This dude ,Sarang,is only studying chemical computer engineering. No big deal. 😉 Loves his riddles. And is an exceptional artist.  Check out his work. I met him yesterday at jacquies party.  

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MIND AND LIFE MATTERS Your Life, Your Mind – It Matters!  -Rashmi is one of life’s warrior queens. She  has been through so much and she is doing so much with her life. Look out for her novel – here is a synopsis   -One of here favourite quotes is mine too.

‘Since Change is the only thing that is constant, I will say that this blog’s output is ever changing!’


K. Phoenix Where the Essence of Love is Told –Pamela melts my heart. She talks about relationships. It is just a teeny tiny bit of an important part of how we live our lives 😀 -She is currently writing a book called Secrets Unveil   – who doesn’t want to know a secret? I love mystery so secrets -good and bad bring out my inquisitive side. Do I really want to know everyone’s secrets ? Yes and No!   Always Yes first and then um… I  can kind of go:





SHERRIE MIRANDA1 -The Wonderful world of writing   Thanks for taking another chance on my Blog. If there is another Sherrie Miranda 1 out there in the Blogo sphere which is entirely possible – ignore this . This is so fucking exciting! Sherrie is also another novelist who has her book on Amazon called Secrets and Lies -Check it out!     .


Date By Number Starting from zero, a data analyst learns to date  Okay now this a type of Blog I have not come across yet. A 28 year old  female called Sandra G., who is learning how to date. She is genuinely wanting to give solid advice and ‘no quick fixes’ . She has so much stuff on her Blog, one being  a ‘comic’ category which I love. Definitely check out What your sleeping positions say about your relationship

I am happy to know that because me and the G sleep like this means all is well in the Willows . I thought it meant we had issues- sigh of relief 😉  Ha ha!



And finally,

Get Lost  that was all I saw  when I clicked on the link and I was like ” okay….” but then a beautiful picture of mountains and lush greenery and roads with no cars on them made me go

“Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah- Yes I would love to get lost”  –

This appears to be a new Travel writing Blog so yeah  check it out (especially if you are going to Thailand anytime soon)   Love this dudes sense of humour. It translates well on paper/ screen.


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Daisy is a sentient “monster”.

We all have to start somewhere to get to somewhere else right?

A year of volunteering and training done so far and all of the effort has been 100% worth it.


So, today I am very proud to say I successfully helped to put together a Mental health awareness workshop and co -facilitate it.

I felt so at home. I felt the most comfortable I have ever been. I’ve helped out with a few workshops before but this was like my mini baby step to doing something I didn’t think I could do.

‘Be your greatest cheerleader – nobody else is likely too.’


Upon reflection I realised we still have a long way to go to reduce and breakdown Stigma against Mental health issues in our community and society.

I stick by my rule of always being authentic. I have nothing to hide.  The more I shared, the more  I felt I connected with other people.

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People opened up  and it was awesome to observe this.

We all have mental health and I discovered a lot of people have similar issues. We deal with them in different ways and some can have more extreme ways of coping than others or vice versa.

I’m on a roll here . ha ha

I know what you are thinking. Just let me have this moment? Please!

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United, we can break down the stigma attached to mental health and address the issue properly.

We all have a mind and a body -so no one- unless a person defines themselves as an actual (not metaphorical)   robot- is susceptible to having Positive mental health and Negative mental health over the course of a life time.

Why do we feel ashamed to be labelled?  We quite happily wear labels like Prada , Gucci, Matalan , doctor , chef , cleaner, politician ?

I don’t have any shame in what I have done or what I have been through. I have so much respect for the people I meet here and in the real world.

I am truly on a mission.

Perfection is unattainable!

We need to leave that with the Romans.

Look to the future .

Even better pause and take time to enjoy the moment. Look around you and be happy with what you have.

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Don’t read beauty magazines or buy into the celeb media market.

Pick up a book and expand your mind.  Take pictures. Paint, draw, act.  Get creative.

I have recently found out that a lot of people Photoshop ( I mean really Photoshop) their social media images.

No wonder I don’t recognise people when I am out and about in the big wide world.

I am kind of  joking . 😀

 I do day dream when I am out and about.

I always have a million things going on in my head.

Not everyone does this Photoshop thing  but to know that people do, just made my jaw drop.

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So I am going to stick with being real. It seems to be working.

I can smile at strangers in the street and they smile back.

We are all human.

We need food, exercise ,sleep, a toilet…….  Can you see where I am going with this?

That’s it for now.

I did it.

We did it.

Totally motivated and ready to break down stigma.

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My  mantra is:

‘I am successful at whatever I do.’ 

no matter if that means getting out of bed or getting my degree.