Life nonsense Intolerance

*Complete nonsense trigger warning*  ( inspired by my out of tune singing of Smash mouths-‘all Star’)

 

Hey now you’re  afuckstar!

 I’m so bloody frustrated,

Orgasms in the office stopped mid flow,

 because my printer  got jammed,

And made life slow.

Everybody

Wants a piece of fame.

Fuck it.

 It’s dismal.

Its shallow.

These still waters run deep.

I’m swimming off to  get away from  ‘the look at me’ protestors  with their self-drawn,scrawled  picket’.

I’m frustrated.

Paper over load.

Jam makes me sticky .

I need more than cursing semen.

I’ve got energy  I need to burn up.

Let me feast like a queen-on  sushi and haute cuisine.

It’s not like I have nothing to do.

I have a to do list ,

Daisy in the Willows  believe  it or not.

I’m not getting my usual kicks from turning blue.

I’m talking nonsense cos I’m frustrated.

People are fickle.

So, here I  am

typing — wisely refusing to do any ass wiping-

  I’m worth more than a nickel.

Money is a means to an end

Credit – I’m borrowing on limited time only .

Interest served for  these corporations

Who turn my life into a hang mans noose.

 Game over.

cul de sac

loopy dead end.

Natural-

no makeup-

Everybody wants  a fake bake .

I failed the pencil test rule

I need to buy new lingerie for own my blushing breasts sake.

sexual and passionate-

extremist –

not a fan of

Being  Laid In.

Nonsense .

Not procrastinating.

look at me

I’m transparent-

Casper  the ghost has nothing  on this glowing  skin .

Free verse

I don’t fit in.—

 there’s no scene

Unless I acknowledge  it .

Let me be ignorant.

Insight is turning me into some evil mutant

Elementary.

I’m a music whore — to my very core.

Hell has nothing on me-

Sending tickets to remind them I am the serpent from mythic folklore.

Nudity.

Cover up

 Bare skin

 Shut your taboos up .

I have nothing to hide….

-except a few stretch marks and an imagined belly that resembles  raw pork in a butchers  shop

Shave my head

Take my dignity

Fuck that.

I’m feeling rather ranty.

So much to do.

Typing shit – I’m probably due my meds cos now I’m  on Electric Avenue.

Write to recover from mental imbalances.

I’m feeling better-

my memory’s erased from  CBT shock  therapy.

Thanks doc , I brought extra large diapers,

and now I’m better walking round like baby Huey-

quwackers,

with a

 toddler mentality of a pig.

SOS

Before I get diced into  a stew with other mashed up veggies.

 

*Apologies for this post* 

 

 

 

 

 

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Not the Messiah

Big day in the U.K.

My musings……

Let’s sort  out any confusion

I’m under no great illusion

that Corbyn is  NOT the messiah to lead this island

to balmy weather.

Fair in the ideas he postulates.

Words that that resonate with humanities mantra of together.

Don’t expect a perfect world unless we all put in some labour

One man can speak for the many but the many must graft for the life they seek in ardour.

the many make changes – X marks your choice

It’s not over.This is but the start – it’s time to think outside of the box – continue to use your new found voice.

This is phase one of an arduous journey

We will lose if we don’t endure the marathon and have JC’s back when it all gets thorny.

Don’t lose faith

Keep your head looking  to the above.

It’s not a one man job

It’s up to all of us to stand the test -stay the course

perhaps one day we will see a world blossom from our sacrifice to give it one love.

 

Today I vote labour.

If there was a chance GREEN would or could win this election, I would have voted for them

 

Athena

Sights of sanity

conquest over humans infamy.

moving faster than the speed of light.

computers can’t process the spoken  word

lose track of sight.

Soaring,

tumbling

race  to expose hidden epiphany.

vocabulary fails Athena from reaching success in the liturgy.

damn harmonisation – pomadera technique.

Time management  -father grant one hour for those deaf,dumb and blinded

By the oppression tumble from the mouth of the libertarians speech.

hypophysectomise critical on the downfall .

Search engine optimises  – tracks a perfect pitch call.

Saviour hear these mantras sent up  in earnest.

Soul laced,

racy,

its breathless.

it’s for the greatest good  Nottinghamshire’spoorest.

Bath bubbles wait for a body that has matter .

69 spoonfuls of bio oil smooth out the stretch marks-

dissolves the fat cats.

Watch them  scatter.

Enemy pilots covert zombie nuns in a pig stye

Overthinking- condensates these cloud tufted ideas.

The flow loses integrity – it stands for the lie.

Shaking bones to release the overspill.

Athena  won’t be a subject to her  own life gains and losses.

Stay true to her style.

No  sounds  of a  Swedish  rehashed assembly

lined out to bear all our crosses.

Stunted by the overthink- look away from her spinal  index

a mind blinks in epiletic seizures.

Unsanitary insults tossed around,

a tussled rustle

Nomad hiding in the bushes

He doesn’t whether  he’s angry or horny

Either way should fuck some common  sense into her.

procrastination halts.

Spaces so tight it has to play its ordained key.

Sounds of queer folk living off  Givenchy.

Rumours, ill gotten behaviour

pussy cat kneeding into yesterdays lingerie.

Not so much economical as busy with the normal day to day.

No digits on the clock,

time shows up in a 5 year old making intelligible sentences.

Forced to awaken from her slumber.

Time lapsed under the sound of a deity clapping out thunder.

what’s up with the pretences?

Athena peers into the eyes of a child not so new born.

whispers ‘listen with both ears’

Goddess takes her own advice and is graced with the miricle of life;

she succumbs to tears.

Finally managed to get up on the retrograde.

Trumped on an ally.

Her apoligies can still be heard in the fade.

Outed for having an opinion.

A belief!

Offended the entire faith of chritianity.

exhiled by her father figure.

She stands her ground where other men bow their heads.

Money makes a human weak in the teeth.

One fine day the bull will take off his horns when in pause mode.

The eagle will descend and emotions will spill out of  its  beak

hybridisation is the result of such an offload.

Glitter , maroon -carpets may seize the day and fly.

Although the author of these words questions the reason why.

Calling out to a nation of intellectual breeders.

They never want to hire former institutionalised  life seekers.

Whose truly deserving of at least the 90 th chance?

Some people don’t even live to experience their own wedding day dance.

Stuttering over each word. Tempted to  cuss.

Athena refuses to get stuck in reverse.

Ready to fertilise blood with the dark night of the soul.

Athena never passes up a challenge

uh oh

time to stop her before she’s crying over spilt milk

Betrayal   overheard by a righteous all seeing mole living in a borrowed hole.

 

The fable of Alison.

Paper, rock or scissors?

Choose one and you may win treasures.

Paper!

Congrats you have received a one-year wedding anniversary.

I’m not even married – how is this a gift I can accept ever so gratefully, oh harry?

Will you marry me?   I can make it true.

Alison threw a rock -aimed for the right side of Harries’ forehead- blood leaked out leaving his lips blue.

A twisty smile caught the ends of Alison’s mouth.

She needed a pair of scissors to cut out his heart.

Grim, I agree but her character is slighly  Magee.

Squiggled by all the paper cut out men she’s collected over the years.

Paper mache collage project- in an attempt to fix her heart.

Glue worked better when she inhaled it’s fumes .

She would depersonalise from her very self and awake discombulated- and rather confused.

This is the sad tale of how alison decided she needed to repair her heart.

She flipped a coin that flipped her mind – all in one turnabout,

she came around -started singing the the Hokie Cokie.

Her twisted jive improved when the moon drew in a little closer.

She could almost hear a beating heart – she put her hand to her chest and,

well, she fell apart.

Envious stares at Man Mickey Finn – his heart beat loudly annd glowered within.

He was her first.

First attempt to re enter the game of tick tockers.

Little did she know that this manic method would send her over to the bog marsh rockers.

Frozen on ice add a straw and a blueberry, she sipped her amorous bloody cocktail – Mary already had men gouging her blood everyday.

Shaken not stirren.

Stern she was shaking.

What did Mary’s conception have that made men fall head over heel and lap for her attention?

Frowned, knitted eyebrows – she added her own  rouge splash  to the mix.

Men looked straight throught her – perhaps she needed a bar of a twix?

She had a cunning plan- not evolved or well thought out . She tuned up her senses whenever men were about.

The throbbing , pulstating came not from the heart.

An alarming discovery – It came from below the waist.

Mary – scartlet virgin?  miracle,  my arse!.

Poor Alison only wanted to feel desired.

When she went for her next ingredient,

she balked at its form and tried to  appeal to its art .

Phallic and paternal it made  her blush from the internal .

How would she get it to stay erect so she could snip it off when it was ready to launch and eject?

She tickled the floating accompanied planets and amusement came out in oohs and aahs .

Just a little longer, Alison thought blustered through scrunched up eyes.

 make sure you aim for the right glass and not the glass eye. 

The navy would be proud of her solid sea legs.

She mixed this new concoction.  so sure she was,

 she convinced me she was  devout.

Up the straw the gloopy mixture reached her swollen taste buds.

Horrified she spat it out –  perhaps she needed to make it a little more tart.

She came acrosss a nursing mother – whipped out her hunting tools.

Crying Babe clattered to the tarmac.  Scattered  Mother one breast left on the right side.

Shake it up and  down the hatch . She waited for the rush of ardours to pour in.

Misery entered without a courterous knock. Sit down you gapless, toothy banshee of distrust.

Tears rung around her neck -weighing in at a hefty sized albatross.

The grief of being ignored compelled her into complete disorder.

How could she end this frenzied quest without settling into a forlorn heap of a mess?

Then a thought rainbowed across her mind. It lifted the burdened clouds and she put her hand to mouth to suppress a giggle.

If no one would have her then she knew what was best.

Alison abandoned her empathy in the puddle of complicated attempts to gain acceptance.

She proudly took her first step into her role as the the Queen of hearts.

If men wouldn’t love her, she would make sure they could love no other.

What a dreadful tale, is there are moral to end this fable  – make it an epic!

Jesus wept!

I get bonus points if I end this and say  she transformed – yes she did and serve this as warning on how to never ignore the self- proclaimed pious.

 

 

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LINDA SOCS WORD PROMPT HERE START WITH THE LETTER ‘P’ AND BONUS POINTS FOR ENDING PIECE IN A ‘P’

 

Hope’s unique gravity

I just wanna do my thing.

I don’t wanna hurt nobody or anybody with the way I decide to go.

I’m all heart – Sensitive a subject of the dark arts but in truth, I can’t really stop the blood flow;

coursing through my veins. I don’t need blood clots to interfere with my emotions.

I like to feel.

From time to time, circle crops set up home on my turf – I’d like to say it is an alien probing and feign ignorance, I  can’t deny  the familiar  weight of sentimentality  surgery.

Unforgettably  invasive- it is real.

Paranoid thoughts – tension is all I have set  on my watch dial. I know I have not been Santa’s best girl every time.

Honestly, I do enough good to save me from paying for another crime.

Honest intentions. Soul soft and pure. Warped sense of humor.

Bold, moody, loving ,trusting, overly sensitive cysts congregate into lumps, deciding on the logistics and geometrics, of developing a  cost effective  tumor.

Screams above – Take me – unleash me from the scourge of hell that I find my feet clad in cast  iron.

No one else can cut the chain. Raggle out that last breath.

Breathe life into a place  for the ones who seek redemption in their conceptualized   Zion.

Fighting spirit. Fighting a war. A battle within – Gore – more gore .

I deplore.

I abhor.

Is this really all she has to show for herself  and sell on the haggle market shop floor?

Brecht. Disconnect.

Fayre .Disrepair.

Coquette. Disinfect.

eclair. Declare.

Life takes us down alleys where the shit tide threatens to pass the neckline.

Think quick, Grasshopper – put that cap on backward and move into  a new gear. Time to engage and decline or re-define.

Shattered thoughts. Media social networks taunt.   Pull the plug. I’m  done with the fictitious lives.

Comparisons in a house of distorted mirrors. Insecurity breeds, incubate in these surroundings – glass shatters – contaminating other entities- is how it   thrives.

Worry,

Worry,

about not the friends who are not .

Worry about the ones who  are in ‘yours truly’ life and are what you would call ‘your lot’.

Happiness is not a concept. Dolce and Gabbana shoes heighten the germicidal  sensation of  Dopamine overload syndrome- early onset.

The human touch, the words we use. More lasting splendor than debiting additional  digits from your visa card, in an attempt, to feel less deprived. Wage a bet.

Birthdays are for celebrating –  don’t ignore the day you  not only gasped but grasped your first true breath.

It takes skill to meander through the valleys, hills, low-lying turnstiles, the rabbit holes of seemingly eternal strife.

You have passed by many  costly  troll bridges –  and managed to get away with what is most sacred – your life.

Another day  has passed – look at what you have done not what you have lost.

Focus on your strengths, not your adversaries – no need to subject yourself  to more savage beatings at an unnecessary cost.

No motivation – it’s okay,we all have these moments thinking we have forever lost our precious marbles

Get back on the wheel and break dance – do a wheely – show off that you have emerged from the eye of the storm – scarred but intact .

 Be pleasant,smile  it’s okay you’ve got this .Thank the alert, coast guard marshalls.

Live. Eat. Pray.

or

Give. Beat.Stray.

whatever you do,

always have your say.

 

Catch 22

Fall – leaves turn shades of browns and greens.

my heart dips and I don’t feel  that same sense of  summer’s beams.

Alone. I look to my left. Creativity shines- glitter, stilettos- latex, white faux fur coats. All legs.

Like a string of pearls flung across a room,  a musky scent wafts across my midst.

Temptations persist. Glamour. Warmth is all I seek. Summer,why do you have to be so cruel?

I know if I cross over to the other side – I’ll be feeling the  warmth – it will be pimped out in box ring styles – I won’t have time to dodge the fists.

My body will burn up an exotic shade of hues. I will have no rest.

Hell is the other side of Summers gluttonous  jazz bassline.

One hit. One vein. Blood – artificial nirvana could infiltrate my being.

I won’t have to think of the biting cold that is ringing in my ears. Muffled will be the ice cone, frozen on the edge of my nose. It doesn’t matter who sees that I have been seen.

Bus shelters full, spikes erect from the corporate  underground – I can’t sit down. I know it takes less muscles to smile than frown.

Energy is all I have to see me through this cycle of  undomesticated abuse. October may be  Domestic abuse awareness month.

If I hadn’t left my keeper, I would still have a roof over my head.

A blanket.

I would still be touched.

 Roughed up .

Better the devil you know – I know every one of his moves. I know when to dissociate –

detach my mind

from my body.

Floating above the marital , martial art stylised  bed – I see myself and that devil I married,grabbing folds of my skin. He doesn’t notice the smell of the new conditioner I bought at Asda or how soft the sheets feel now they  have been newly spun.

Dryer . I’m dry. He doesn’t notice the lack of moisture. He doesn’t notice that all of that fluid has shot up to my eyeballs . I refuse to let them free flow – I am not her. I’m floating.

Fly on the wall. Caught up in a spiders web. I have to watch. It doesn’t matter if I have a crick in my neck – oh hang on a minute is he choking me?

Leftover food languishing in the sink drain. He switched the waste disposal  on to automatic .

Arrested, I am back in bed , under him. Time to vogue with my lips and give him  a little pucker.

These white sheets  have turned red in his need to let off steam. I come out in blisters hovering underneath his vapour.

Turn my neck – feels like I need a box of  throat lozenges for having to get all deep throat.

5 am flashing in stimulant green.

I’m 5 months pregnant. I am going to be late.

Grab the nearest decent clothes. Pull on my Adidas trainers. Scrape my hair up into a ponytail.

Finally the motivation to go on the run. I don’t have to time myself. I know his schedule well.

An Olympic torch passes into my hand. I’m running for freedom . Liberty is my destination.

I can start over.

Spring – blues, violets, colours in a perfect union – uncompressed. Naturally dressed.

For the first time in months, I feel like I belong. I too am a medley of colours. I blend in.

Natures milkshake collects in my breasts –  4 months to go until I give birth to a miracle of pure life.

Not branded a colour – just innocence – a chance to see a light – work on my soul and tackle it all. This is the only cure.

Vanilla.

I am no Killer.

Life goes in cycles. It passes by fast. There are no traffic jams when you have to pick up your feet and walk.

Eyes cast down, belly protruding.

Christian volunteers crouch down next to me- hand me a card.

Die and be reborn.

They can help me. I just have to give my old life to our saviour. I’ve never met him but he sounds

Forgiving, comforting, caressing- a handwash with extra Aloe vera – calming properties.

All I have to  do is offer my unborn child to him and I can enter paradise with the rest  of  my weary comrades.

Eyes raise up to the bitter sky. I’ve always thought whatever is up there twinkling and winking down at me is having a far better time than me.

My unborn deserves a place in heaven. Earth only promises scars and  wild jungle roots to keep it grounded to the spot.

The ultimate sacrifice.

Did I fold in with this cult out of cowardice?

I will drink my poison.

Maybe this winter I will be reunited with the one that let out a sudden cry.

Lead me not into temptation. I lie  down , no need to be afraid, child. I close my eyes and sigh.

Hope is my last premise.

* Inspired by domestic violence awareness month*

 

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OCTOBER 2016 (IMAGE SOURCED FROM GOOGLE)

 

HERE IS A LINK TO A  POST I WROTE,ON 11TH MAY 2016 , ABOUT MY OWN PERSONAL EXPERIENCES IN A D.V. RELATIONSHIP , TO RAISE DOMESTIC ABUSE AWARENESS IN MY COMMUNITY AND   SOCIETY.

CLICK ON THE PINK HIGHLIGHTED LINK BELOW

THE FREEDOM PROGRAMME

*photo credit Rhode Island Francesca Woodman, Benjamin Moore *

 

 

R.E.S.P.E.C.T.

Oh yeah baby – all I am asking for is a little bit of respect…. ( totally dancing on my own in my room – may just grab my hair brush )

TOTAL RESPECT to a very good mate of mine on Word Press for this award.

Who doesn’t know Paul ?

Talented, generous and a born fighter. I have a lot of time for this dude. Look at this face what is not to love?

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PAUL AND THE INFAMOUS DAPHNE

Don’t let the title of  his Blog put you off – this is not all about fitness but it will put you through your paces. Or should I say Paul will.

wwwpalfitness

To train or not to train      – check his Blog out!

So a respect award is pretty fucking awesome right? I want to thank Michelle for nominating me for the one lovely award Blog. I recently just accepted this so I have decided I am going to give this award to some one else I think is awesome.

GUESS WHO?

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SIMPLY ETTA D.    Your quotes  have inspired me and helped push me to move forward.

Here she is : I forfeit my award from Michelle  @ PSYCHEDELIC BAY -WHERE HOPE IS REAL   – Small shout out to her partner in crime 😉 Cezanne. 

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SIMPLY BEAUTIFUL INSIDE AND OUT 

Before I continue with accepting this really cool RESPECT award. I just want to let everyone who reads this that there is an epic party going on this weekend at Jaquies a cooking pot and twisted tails. place. If you don’t know her.

Where have you been?

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Ha ha. She is another great inspiration and my Blog role model.

I also want to thank Linda G Hill. your  Saturday  soCS -stream of consciousness writing challenge. She  always prompts me to get shit out of my head and onto the screen.  You get me thinking out of my comfort zone which I love! ❤

Then there is the rest of you who I follow and who follow me. You make life that bit easier for me and I love all the different perspectives I read and the cool thoughts and ideas  you have swirling round those brains of yours – The Word Press community are full of heart. We are empaths and should rule the world .

What are we going to do tonight  ,WP posse ?

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Okay so on with accepting my award from Paul.

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THREE QUESTIONS TO ANSWER:

WHAT DOES RESPECT MEAN TO YOU ?

  • It means having faith and self love and self belief. 

  • Respect is about using old school style manners –  that will never go out of style for me

  • Respect is about boundaries and acknowledging others have boundaries and not to cross them and know when not too.

  • It means listening and it requires effort and commitment and compromise

WHO DO I RESPECT THE MOST?

I respect people who are honest with me. Who take me for who I am. I respect people who are true to themselves and are not afraid to stand alone when the shit hits the fan. I respect people who refuse to give up – the people who rise and fall and rise and fall and rise again.  I have a lot of respect for my Mother and my Nan. Two ladies who fought to keep me alive. I would probably  be dead today if it were not for their persistence that I could find a way to be happy in this world.

WHAT DO I RESPECT THE MOST ABOUT MYSELF?

Woah I guess…. I wear my heart on my sleeve. I don’t hide my issues. I fucking embrace them. I am not really great at giving up. I like myself . I have a lot of love to give to people. I don’t take bullshit but I can’t hold a grudge. I try but I can’t -especially if it is some one who I feel or once felt a connection with. I hate conflict. 

ONLY THREE NOMINEES?

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These are solely based on recent discussions I have had with these Bloggers.

  1. BRENDA  @CYBERNETIC BLONDE

  2. SERENA @ SERENA JOY SINCLAIR Lifelong Learner

  3. BROOKE @ theutopiauniverse

  4. LISA         @KIDSCRUMBSANDCRACKERS

  5. ALL THE PEOPLE WHO HAVE MENTIONED ME IN THEIR BLOGS THIS PAST WEEK. I DON’T KNOW HOW TO FIND YOU ALL ON WORD PRESS YET BUT I WILL……..

  6. T                MY LITTLE BIT OF SERENITY   HAPPY 6TH ANNIVERSARY TO YOU AND PRESH 

  7. QUEEN BEE @ I SING THE BODY ELECTRIC